Tim says: take your pick and let me know which you prefer by voting in the poll to the right.
“Skipping Stones”
A (very) Short Story by Simply Tim
Jimmy Rose picked up a shiny stone from the bank of his father’s pond and skipped it across the surface. His little sister, Sally, clapped her hands and gleefully jumped up and down. Jimmy loved his sister, but she always followed him everywhere. He searched the bank for another flat stone, found one, and flicked it across the pond. Somewhere in-between the third and fourth skip, Sally made her special laugh and the stone disappeared in a puff of smoke.
“Cut that out, Sally,” shouted Jimmy. He spun around, caught Sally giggling in the bushes. “I hate it when you do that.”
Sally frowned.
“Where do things go when you poof them out like that, anyhow?” Jimmy placed his hands on his hips.
“It went to… Rock Heaven,” said Sally. “That’s where rocks go to live happily ever after, for ever and ever.” Sally was big on fairy tales because — no matter what — happily ever after was always the way they ended.
“There is no ‘happily ever after’, Sally,” scolded Jimmie. “‘Happily ever after’ is a big, fat, lie adults tell to keep us kids in line — just like Santa Claus. No one is happy for ever and ever!”
“That’s not true!” screamed Sally. “There is too a Santa Claus, and there is, too a happily ever after… you’re just making all of that up!” She began to cry.
Jimmy glanced down and picked up the most perfectly-shaped stone he’d ever seen. He threw it as hard as he could, but somewhere in-between the sixth and seventh bounce, Sally stopped crying and made her special laugh. Jimmy disappeared in a puff of smoke and Sally skipped happily ever after into the sunset.
ENDING 1 END
ENDING 2
Jimmy glanced down and picked up the most perfectly-shaped stone he’d ever seen. He threw it as hard as he could. Somewhere in-between the sixth and seventh bounce, Sally stopped crying and made her special laugh. Then, she disappeared in cloud of smoke.
“Skipping Stones” Copyrighted© 2011 by Simply Tim’s Blog Spot.
All rights reserved worldwide.
I go for honesty. There is no santa claus. So Jimmy told the truth. Fairy tales are not real. He told the truth again. There’s no rock heaven. Sally lied. She deserved to disappear.
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It depends on the intent of the story. If intended to be a joke, use ending 1. If intended to be more thought-provoking or to have a moral, then ending 2 would be a better fit.
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Tim,
I vote for ending #1; we need more people like Sally.
-Abra8
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Hahaha! I’ll take Ending 1.
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Well, of course she went in a “poof”! Who wouldn’t want be in Rock Heaven along with Buddy, Janis, Elvis and all the others!
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Bye bye, Jimmy! Who needs another pessimist cluttering up the landscape?
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Ending #1…yes.
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Heh! Classic psych 101 question. Is you the “do-er to” or is you the “done to”? Very simply put, ending one identifies the girl as a type A personality – extrovert; in ending two the girl is type B – introvert.
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I suppose you might say, “There is no happy ending to this story.“
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I like ending #1; I think it is poetic justice that Jimmy disappeared after being mean to Sally.
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I liked the first one better. Jimmy got his due for spoiling happily ever after for his little sister. And her skipping off into the sunset coincided with the rocks skipping off to rock heaven.
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Ending #1
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I like ending #1. When Sally made Jimmy disappear with her special laugh, I imagined an evil little grin on her face as if she knew where he was going. However, it leaves the reader wondering even moreso than if Sally had poofed to her happily ever after.
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Reminds me of a story, the title of which has slipped my mind (as has the author’s), where there was a crotchety old man who had a knack for disbelieving things.
The things he disbelieved in tended to disappear.
I don’t recall how it happened, but he came in one day not recalling who he was, went upstairs grumbling, starting to undress. His wife heard the first shoe hit the floor, some grumbling, and then . . . silence.
On the first ending, I liked it a bit more but the “skipped happily ever after” part took something away. Seemed a bit awkward to me.
Just random thoughts from a reader who can’t be a writer and appreciate those who can.
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Ken, I think I agree about the “skipped happily” part. Originally it was just into the sunset. But, then again…
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Since Sally believes with her whole heart that there is so too a “happily ever after”, it seems only right that SHE should be the one to run to it.
Ending number one just seems evil…….
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Either that, or — she sent her brother there to prove he was wrong? I know, I know. I’ve been flip-flopping on this one for several months.
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